ooh radio!

so i haven't really blogged about what i've been doing lately.. hence the stress. haha. it's actually kinda interesting. but i dunno, maybe i'm not used to it so i just feel so burdened at the moment. but with a bit of strength (and loads of encouragement) i think i might just about be able to handle it.

my crew minus 2 more.

anyway, this is really the first time i'm actually going to col on a sunday. oh gosh... i'm becoming one of those... people with no life. i had a life... it just had to be put on hold for a while. ok denise stop complaining *slap*.



so these few days i've been kinda busy with my radio production assignment. which is basically to host and produce a radio show for an hour. yes, we do have our own erm... radio station and yes, it's broadcasted live on campus. that was, for your info anyway. so now you know.



i'm babbling.

but it's been interesting. i mean, how often do you actually get the chace to play with knobs and force people to listen to your sweet voice for an hour?

only 2 more times to go.

need a light

every monday i look forward to the weekends. and the weekend comes. and it passes. and monday comes again. and again. and again.

it's like a tunnel. and i can't see the light.

it's like a hamster wheel. no matter how hard you run, you'll get nowhere.

i just feel so trapped. so overwhelmed. and i don't understand why... it's not as if i'm that stressed. nothing's wrong with me, but then again, nothing's right either. i just feel so frustrated with everything. and yet, i have no great need... i feel so lost, but i have God to guide me.





it's just... everyday's the same old thing. wake up, col, home, wake up, col home, wake up.... it's like... what's the point of it all? it's just so meaningless. where is hope when i need it? where is light when i can't see? i'm tired... so tired of feeling tired. so tired of all this monotonousness.





if this is stress i must be horrible at dealing with it.

i need to see the end of my tunnel. i need something to hold on to. i need something to look forward to.

weird

last night i dreamt that liv and chelsea drew 1-1.

omgosh...
they did.

but own goal la.... *sakit hati*

lol and i also dreamt that manU lost to barca. 5-6. so we'll see in the morning.

crazy unstable

crazy unstable
i should listen
yet
it's like roaring water inside.
my thoughts are noisier than everything you're saying

crazy unstable
everyday's a valley or a slope
times of peace
or
times of turmoil

crazy unstable
come drown with me,
come fly with me.
don't come


i'm a bundle of contradictions. maybe you don't understand, maybe you do. don't get me. i don't care.

i'm baffling, i'm exasperating, i'm impossible, i'm difficult, i'm complicated, i'm depressing, i'm sensitive.
take your pick.

i am not doing the tag

bleaugh... bored.

so i decided not to do the tag (hope that's ok with those who tagged me). anyway, believe me it's a good thing. was debating whether or not to do it but stopped myself when all i could come up was


7. what would do if you had a million dollars?
squander it all off on MEN, wine and song.

4. what do you wish for most?
to be supergirl.


so you see... it just ain't gonna work out.

joy + ME

joy unspeakable that won't go away

with just enough strength

to live for today

so i never have to worry what tomorrow will bring

cos my faith is on solid rock

i am counting on God

~counting on God (everyone overcome, desperation band)~

somehow the words of this song just seem to speak to me. it just hit me that yeah, i never have to worry because God is there and He's faithful. and i want joy unspeakable.







my JOY has returned. i guess it has never gone away... just i didn't want to see it. and i'm full of it. happyness. and i do want everyone else to have that joy too. joy with peace. everything just seems to fall into place and i'm at peace with the world today. maybe i might not be this happy when i wake up tomorrow morning (oh man... 8am class again! *groan*), or when i get lectured... but still, i think i'll just try to live on day at a time, put one feet forward at a time. to look at things as a whole would be too scary and too overwhelming... so i'll just go through it slowly and (hopefully) cheerfully.



so today i had sushi. sushi king has this promotion where all rice based sushi are only rm2. for card holders ler. so followed my addicted friends there to eat. haha. when i say addicted i mean twice in 2 days until they got constipated. tsk... too much seafood maybe? and then mcflurry! lol. yes i'm giving in to my sugar cravings... but still... happy day deserves happy food. and i deserve a reward for going through 7 hrs of classes without complaining today.

i'm proud of me *beams*.

sushi-ing with my mates. actually we're already done eating here. haha

being in my happy mood actually put me into my get-clean-get-tidy mode too. *even prouder moment* i actually filed all my papers neatly and cleaned my very dirty desk that makes mel complain everytime he sees it. ok there's not much difference now still, but at least it's lizard sai-less now.








was kinda bored in class today so i finally figured how to blow my fringe up. finally.

it's kinda easy really.

or i'm just really bad at it.








and my dog must be having this revolution. the 'how to be a GOOD dog' revolution. i think. usually when i come home or anyone of my family members, she'll be peeping at us from the couch, wagging halfheartedly at us without bothering to move from her spot. but now... i don't know who she's been talking to, but whoa! she's always and i mean always greeting us at the door like we've been away for a year every time we come back home. which is so sweet. there's nothing like seeing a smiley face after a tiring day.

*smiley face*

*more smiley faces*

:)

.

another update

i know i haven't been good about updating lately. i don't know, hols just seem to have that effect on me. the lazy effect.

anyway, my 3 week hols are just about ended. yeah, i start classes tomorrow *makes sorrowful face* , i just got my timetable today and my gosh... heavy... but well, i shan't complain (yet). i guess being busy is better than doing nothing and being bored all day long. yes? no?

so i got my results for my exams for last sem. if you remember, the papers which i took on my b'day. praise God! straight A's. yay! which is a very good thing cos i need something to pull up my cgpa to a nicer number. and i'm very thankful i got what i got because it's MORAL, and heheh... it's like my sleeping pill. my very kind friends will be nudging me to wake up during tutorials.

and i can't seem to write long-ish posts nowadays.

but i am happy.

happy to love and happy to be loved.

lovely lovely redang

back from blue blue redang. just one word to describe it. BLUE! in a good way i mean... the sea is the loveliest blue ever and the sky is gorgeous too... and the sand is sooo white and soft. breathtaking really. i'll never look down on m'sian beaches ever again now i've seen what beautiful is. my gosh, this is as beautiful as the beaches in aus!



this trip, all i wanted to do was kick back and relax, lie on the deck chair in the shade, listening to the waves, reading... seriously, i think there's something about the sea air that makes people lazy. and for me, lazier ler. this is a place where i don't mind being by myself. just me and God and the beauty around me.

so we went on a 3 days 2 nights trip to redang. actually, it was more of like a 2 days 2 nights thing in redang island itself. the 3rd day was spent mostly touring kuala terengganu. geography lesson: redang is in terengganu btw.

and well... it was just.. wonderful. although, i did complain a bit. ok a lot when i had to board the 7 hour bus back to penang. i hate being on the road. but overall, i'm thankful. redang loves me.

i think.

ps: to see pics, go to http://www.flickr.com/photos/25291671@N07/