playing to different kinds of sport in two days makes me feel athletic.
almost. haha.


but i'm liking it... getting back to when i at least get myself away from the comp and sweat a little. and i can at least hit the tennis ball over the net and in the court. which is something i forgot i knew how to do :D guess i'm not THAT bad afterall.


i love the high i get after a good game of whatever. beats chocolate hands down.

and for me to say that is like... you know it's gotta be good cos i can endorse choc.

those tiny little things

listening to kate voegele now.



i'm liking how the previous few days have turned out. nothing too epic happening so it's just been pleasant with not much going on. i like how it's cooler here compared to in malaysia. hence, lack of heat = more things get done. i love being productive... it makes me feel as if i haven't wasted my time or the day. which is why i don't really like waking up at the crack of noon. feels like i've wasted my whole beautiful morning. hmm... that probably didn't sound like me a few months back, but i've learnt to love waking up early. plus, i have such a great view from my window (ok it's just a carpark view but at least i get to see the sun and moon), waking up at dawn definitely rewards me. i think i've seen more sunrises here than i have the whole of last year. and come to think of it, the year before last as well. it's just breathtaking really... love how the purple swirls into the rising rays of orange and later moves into the lightest of sky blue. i feel so loved looking at it. seems like it's just done for me at times like this. i know, very silly musing of mine.

and the moonlight that streams into my room through my curtained window... just magical.


anyway, i've just come back from an invigorating walk from the grocery store to get... what else? it was a little drizzly but not too cold so i didn't mind the walk a tad. besides, it's nice to walk in the morning while being productive :) this has just put me in a good mood! besides, i had good company.


i finally went to the christchurch casino on friday night. nothing too great... probably cos i didn't gamble at all (can't believe i'm that good huh?). but i reckon it was a mercy i didn't cos everyone was having a terrible night, not winning much and losing quite a bit.


you win some you lose some.

doesn't only apply to monetary issues.
i suppose i had to lose some to gain something else. life is unexpected...


i don't mind actually. haha. bring it on!

food food glorious food!

pictures of all the mouth watering, diabetes inducing, makes you not able to fit into your jeans, desserts courtesy of my fav guilty pleasure blog. haha. are you salivating yet?


you probably can deduce now that i'm probably hungry and maybe having more than a little craving for something dessertish. i always want to bake stuff but the oven here in hinau is utterly USELESS!! oh i forgot, it's not even an oven. plus i don't have an electric mixer. we do however, have a (i forgot what it's called).... manual mixer? lol... and no i do not like to torture myself mixing and mixing and mixing batter.


which reminds me, i still haven't finished the no-bake cookies i "baked" a few weeks bad. i wonder if they've turned bad sitting in the fridge. this is the first time i've actually made something which i didn't like and can't bring myself to finish. other people seem to like it (or just don't want to hurt my feelings. appreciated i'm sure).


sugar is the drug that you can legitimately take.
HAHA!








i think i want excessively sugared donuts!






whee~ icf dinners... i just go for the fab desserts. shhh...

i cut my own hair today

yes i actually did.

*shock horror!*

well, what to do? i don't want to pay just for cutting my fringe and i'm lazy to find a hair saloon... so... desperate time calls for desperate measures. but you probably wouldn't notice the difference if you were to see me. more like i just trimmed my hair. now that doesn't sound so scary anymore does it?



on another note, a bit disappointed in some people. but whatever, i'm sure they must have their reasons so i'm going to give them the benefit of doubt. i'm nice see.

but life's good. must just keep reminding myself to count the blessings instead of pinpointing the nasties.

goodbye. have a nice tuesday. or what's left of it anyway :)

fried rice for dinner

you know how some blogs have posts which are consistently labeled, or have this currently listening to: [insert random song here... usually obscure or/and indie music] thingie at every post?
well... this is not one. i did attempt to label all my posts once. i even dedicated a good hour or so of my time to slowly tag them into categories. but that all ended when i wrote my next post and was too lazy to be bothered with it. haha. so there you have it, and arbitrary inconsistent blog in someone who takes pride in giving you the random and abstract. i'm not going to say i'm inconsistent.


it's the second week of term 2. and so far, nothing to complain about. i like how mondays are quite relaxing for me. gives me time to leisurely do my work. and wouldn't you believe it, i've been here for 3 months already! how time flies... another 6 more to go before i can step back to the warm as an oven, maybe warmer weather of the island. but for now, i like it here and like i said, no complaints... someone once said this to me

"sad to leave, and sad to come back"

meaning, you fit in both home and the place that you are now that you're sad to leave both places. i guess i'll have to find out at the end of the year. haha.


other than that, i'm doing good. lazy to give explanation (that's what my lecturer keeps writing in my essays... "elaborate more!!!") so you'll have to content yourself with that. i would really love to write more but as i don't think i had enough of sleep last night (it takes a specific amount of slumber to keep me going) and have been up doing stuff since 9, i'm exhausted.


it's annoying how i have so many pairs of shoes and yet can only wear a few to uni cos they're not really suitable for walking far and fast. i almost got cramps walking in my boots. the people here don't walk; they stride... which makes you feel slow especially when you're blocking their path and you can feel their annoyance just oozing out when they're trying to overtake you. so this makes you walk fast to match their pace. which makes my shoes hurt. annoying.

i should probably get a bike. not.


some people, you think you'll get close to them and probably are for a little while... and then *woosh* they disappear from your life.
while some, you don't expect them to stick around, but they do and end up being a good friend.

then i probably shouldn't expect :)



am pleasure reading the return of sherlock holmes at the moment. it's the lightest of my reads at the moment, and i'm still hoping i can get my hands on some chick lits. but it's not as if i read that much nowadays. i really should i guess. but after a ton of close reading for assignments, the last thing you want to do is read another book. even if it's just for fun.


today at lifegroup we had to list down the qualities we desired in a husband. upon comparing, i don't think i've changed much in terms of what i wanted my dream husband to be like. hehe. to be honest, i think malaysian guys aren't doing too badly in the desire-o-meter... i have observed, and some of my friends have also remarked that msian guys relatively treat their gfs/wives better than most men. they're more dependable, gentlemanly, and most importantly... they actually respect women. of course, that's from our observations only... but i'm sure there're big time jerks out there as well. haha. so msian guys, be proud and don't let me down!



i really need to sleep

i miss roti canai

so, i pretty much did not blog for two thirds of my hols.
[inserts some form of apology about the lack of updates. you're creative, imagine your own version of it which preferably does not have me kneeling over begging for forgiveness]


firstly, my mom came over. so we went out a lot, but funnily enough when people asked me where i brought her and what we did... i find that my answers are so boring. "erm... we went walking around the city, and shopped... willowbank...". while they tramped, went road tripping etc. but still... i had fun, and the most important thing was that mom was here.

and you know how it is when you don't have something and you're alright without it. i mean, you survive without it. but when you get that something and wonder how on earth did you ever live before it. and after that, you cannot survive without it anymore. til you're forced to once again, face withdrawal symptoms and voila! back to square one.

so... what was the point of the long narrative? hmm... just describing how i felt when my mom left. it was like one of those movies where the protagonist comes home to an empty house, 'Ain't no sunshine when she's gone' or equivalent plays in the background. and he/she sees objects that reminds him/her about the person who's gone. cues flashback to happy scenes. lol. dramatic aye, but that was what i felt when i dropped my mom at the airport and came home. it could've been the lack of sleep too. lol. but yeah, before she came, i was fine. i was enjoying myself here. but after she left, i had this terrible bout of homesickness in which all i wanted, was to go homeeeeeee... *whiney voice*

but, i lived.
stating the obvious aren't we, denise





i'm now making my way through the second season of Gilmore Girls. thanks to DC++ (UC's underground sharing network which is not a secret at all), i'm getting all these distractions from doing the important things aka study. yes, it's ALL your fault Hub... lol.
next up, one tree hill seasons 6 & 7. since i accidentally downloaded them. yes really. i really did download them by accident. by the time i realise that they were on their way to my external harddisk, it was too late. well, cos i have no idea how to cancel the downloads once they've started. *sigh* yes, i am that noob... got a problem with that? take it up with me :P


my posts have been very airy of late. all froth and no substance... sob sob... i think i've finally come to realise my potential of being an airhead.

so lalala~ guess what? it's time for academic stuff discussion. i realise that just by saying "academic stuff" makes me sound so very the unintelligent. well, too bad. i'm just fitting into the stereotype of people doing art degrees. it amuses me (in a very annoying way) how people tend to look down at people doing BA's like they're dumber than the rest just because they talk about frothy unimportant things like poetry, or dissect movies for class... reading "storybooks" does not make us dumber than doing maths equations that would make einstein's hair stand up even higher. we might not have as much work to do, but it doesn't mean we think less. in fact, arts students are the ones who practise critical thinking more than the rest of the student body (except probably law students).

and what am i going to do with it when i graduate?
i. don't. know. yet.
so please stop asking.
do you know what you are going to do when you graduate? probably. fair enough.
but how sure are you that you'll be getting that dream job of yours??
so stop asking me.
just don't go there.


boy do i sound angry. lol... well, this is what 'people asking me the same question over and over and over again once they hear that i'm doing isn't-it-enough-to-learn-it-in-school-English' did to me. it hardens you... it makes you angry and crabby and cynical.



my lecturer gave us some grammar exercises to do after he marked our essays.
here's one of them:

On reading the essay the tutor felt many things: sadness, resignation, physical pain.

sneaky way of telling us we sucked huh? i think i must be going crazy because i cracked up on that.



ps:
oops! i think my "intellectual" post became a rant instead.

time to put on your dancing shoes

i can't believe i did but i did.
go for ballroom dance classes that is. LOL. i know... ballroom dancing... i usually associate that with rich older women who have nothing to do who do chachas at hotel bars when the live band is playing. sorry! stereotyping i know... i just still can't get that image out of my head.

so there is this club in uni called UCanDance(?) not really sure of the name but sounds like that la. and some friends of mine invited me to go for their weekly dance classes. yeah, partner dancing. me feeling rather unfit and guilty of it agreed to try it out. i mean, how hard can it be right?

well that was last night.


i have to say, it wasn't too bad... though i did step on a few toes (oops!) and was blur a lot. well, i'm new what... but it was pretty fun! dancing is always fun... well except when i get stressed out cos i can't remember my steps. we had this thing where every 5 mins or so we had to change partners so it was good when you got a lousy partner. haha. i guess the good thing, which was also a bad thing is that ballroom dancing is led by the men so women just follow through and allow themselves to be steered. it's good cos i don't really have to learn the steps and just follow what my partner is doing, but bad that i don't have much control over what i'm doing. i was twirled, steered, shoved, moved around just like a ragdoll. but i like jive... very lively and it's easy to pick up. and i don't have to concentrate on footwork like how i have to in salsa.


i did get a few incredulous "are you sure this is your first time dancing this?" so it was flattering, rather. hehe.

sunshine and wind.... alternately

having hols now... ~tralala hari hari relax aje...

but this hols have been pretty crazy/hectic so far. have been out almost everyday heheh. yah i'm so happening can?
eee i can't believe i'm talking like that. so, just a summary of what i've been doing the past few days (in case you wanted to know which i assume you do but in which case you don't.... stop reading now)

Monday

games night at my flat + shopping



Tuesday

more shopping (no pictures cos was too busy "oooh i like this! i'm gonna try it")



Wednesday

2 beaches in one day. i'm so satiated :) so sorry sumner, but i LOVE new brighton more. and the library overlooks the sea... so pretty aye.

and music prac at night. omgosh i'm playing on sun this week. like scary... cos i didn't expect to be called up that soon. thought i could still relax a bit. but i do love playing and serving and being part of a team... it's awesome! just hope i don't screw it up.


Thursday


games and dessert night for icf which meant i was baking for half of the day before that. which was not too bad as i'm starting to find that there are some traces of a domestic goddess in me (amazing!) as opposed to the utter failure of a womanly female i used to be. so whoever who marries me in the future won't have to suffer. haha.

and later at night, lepak-ed on ilam fields playing frisbee and taking emo shots. man it was cold!




i still have yet to clean my shoes from all that grass.

hues

i think i'm probably going to start this off with another(?) rhetorical question. because i don't feel like sleeping yet and am so uncreative at the moment. oi denise wake up!

i wonder...

why feelings are so easy to catch. like the flu. emoness especially. methinks i need to find a cheery someone to inject joy :)
why in the midst of so much activity i actually feel so lonely.
why i can always listen to other people talk about themselves but when it comes to my turn i just say "nothing much".

omgosh i do sound emo! but bear with me since i hardly blog less than sunshiney posts and i still need an outlet. aww thanks for the support! sheesh i'm not only emo now but crazy as well. you know what?

this might be a bit belated but i just realised that blogging is all about monologing; in other words, talking to yourself. wah scary! all that retrospection. cos you know, that's how psychos are born.

anyway, i got sidetracked... where was i?
oh yes... ze moodiness.

being first, human, then a girl, and lastly denise ong... cloudy days are bound to happen once in a while so... nothing to worry about. i'll be songs of joy again in the morning. i hope. i like waking up and feeling that it's the best day ever, the morning more beautiful than other mornings (by the way, i had that a coupla days ago when i had to wake up early and managed to watch the sun rise. breathtakingly beautifoooool. that put me in a good mood straightaway. the ambers, magentas, violets, and blues all swirling together... God is such an awesomey artist. tried to take a pic of it but cam failed on me)... but then there is always the nagging feeling that if the morning is so perfect there'll be some part of the day that'll be perfect crap as well. i should learn to accept the good things without expecting bad to follow as well.

.
funny how in a foreign land, it seems like a mini malaysia. which is cool cos it's like home only colder and waayyyyy more expensive to have supper (no more kopitiam here), but totally defeats the purpose of my parents sending me here. haha! oh well... where would i be without them? and i'm fitting in well because of them so who cares?! lol, nola, i know God has His own plans for my life.

it is late. i better start sleeping. and dreaming. i want the ocean... i want sand in my toes and the soothing sound of waves...

how on earth are my hols busier than my school days?



have been playing and spending money pretty much since last friday i'm starting to feel slight pangs of guilt. eeps! i want a warm balmy day where u can just laze around on the grass, with your cute summer dress (i'm imagining pastel yellow with white polka dots), with pleasant company, bubbly sunny tunes, and (most importantly) spend nothing. lazy summer days i want you back!



it was cold today... which was alright i guess cos i got to wear my nice black scarf (haha the vainess!). hmm... is it me or am i starting to sound very shallow? i sometimes find myself floating off to put outfits together and plan my wardrobe during word phrases and verisimilitude. or, in other words, class. that is bad!

so yes i guess you'll have to put up with me writing a post with less substance than usual til this mania passes. oh wait, did i ever post up posts with substance? gosh i hope so.


played pictionary and a charade-ish game last night which was crazy! which somehow ended with me and a friend winning both times.. no idea how. i think i might've gotten fatter from all that laughing. have i?


shall not bore you guys any longer... toodles~