hues

i think i'm probably going to start this off with another(?) rhetorical question. because i don't feel like sleeping yet and am so uncreative at the moment. oi denise wake up!

i wonder...

why feelings are so easy to catch. like the flu. emoness especially. methinks i need to find a cheery someone to inject joy :)
why in the midst of so much activity i actually feel so lonely.
why i can always listen to other people talk about themselves but when it comes to my turn i just say "nothing much".

omgosh i do sound emo! but bear with me since i hardly blog less than sunshiney posts and i still need an outlet. aww thanks for the support! sheesh i'm not only emo now but crazy as well. you know what?

this might be a bit belated but i just realised that blogging is all about monologing; in other words, talking to yourself. wah scary! all that retrospection. cos you know, that's how psychos are born.

anyway, i got sidetracked... where was i?
oh yes... ze moodiness.

being first, human, then a girl, and lastly denise ong... cloudy days are bound to happen once in a while so... nothing to worry about. i'll be songs of joy again in the morning. i hope. i like waking up and feeling that it's the best day ever, the morning more beautiful than other mornings (by the way, i had that a coupla days ago when i had to wake up early and managed to watch the sun rise. breathtakingly beautifoooool. that put me in a good mood straightaway. the ambers, magentas, violets, and blues all swirling together... God is such an awesomey artist. tried to take a pic of it but cam failed on me)... but then there is always the nagging feeling that if the morning is so perfect there'll be some part of the day that'll be perfect crap as well. i should learn to accept the good things without expecting bad to follow as well.

.
funny how in a foreign land, it seems like a mini malaysia. which is cool cos it's like home only colder and waayyyyy more expensive to have supper (no more kopitiam here), but totally defeats the purpose of my parents sending me here. haha! oh well... where would i be without them? and i'm fitting in well because of them so who cares?! lol, nola, i know God has His own plans for my life.

it is late. i better start sleeping. and dreaming. i want the ocean... i want sand in my toes and the soothing sound of waves...