in God i trust

in times of trial, he saw only one pair of footprints. "why?" he asked his Lord. "why did You let me walk alone during my hardest parts of life?"

"that one set of footprints that you saw, that was when I carried you."



if i may say so, ever since i arrived here in chch, i have been having a bit of a rough time breaking in so to speak. but as i look back at the past few days, those times when i felt that i was so alone, when i got too homesick, i just realised how involved God is in my life. how much he helped me get through the dreary days of being alone. and also the people he put in my path to help ease the settling in. i'm so blessed because He really is my Jehovah Jireh, my provider. everything i needed, He provided. sometimes, you really need to get out of your comfort zone to know how much He cares for you. in time that you become to accustomed to relying on yourself to acheive things, you somehow forget that Jesus is in control of our lives. but when you find yourself totally and wholeheartedly dependent on Him... that's when miracles start to happen!

and i am excited to see what God has installed for me next.

a little update on myself:
i met this lovely malaysian family from penang through a church member. and they've so kindly invited me into their home to spend time with them, cooked for me, taken me around, and acclimated me with the basic things i needed to know. praise God for that!

tomorrow... laundry and cleanup day. i shall go roam around campus again if i have the time. when are my other housemates moving in?? i'm so impatient to meet them. hope they're great people.

life in ilam

today i went exploring around my campus. or well, a small part of it at least. it's humongous so i couldn't have possibly covered all in a short half hour walk. it was lovely strolling amongst all that greenery and it also made me feel slightly better. so, i present to you a better denise than before. at least, i'm a little less homesick now. anyway, pictures pictures...

greens. you see the signboard in there? yeah that's my uni. UC.

just some random path.

now this is where i live. the ilam apartments.

this is my block. and my room is on the third floor. last window to the left.

my room! heheh a tad messy right now. i have yet to sort things out and tidy it.

and ... the first meal i cooked here. also, the first meal i cooked by myself ever!

and hello!

hello from christchurch

i'm here! christchurch nz and i haven't settled down (still got lots and lots of packing to do), i haven't found a church, i have one friend so far (who also happens to be one of my flatmates), i don't know how long my internet will last though i think i might need a credit card with a larger amount soon, i don't know how long my cash will last me, i'm really horribly homesick i feel like crying everytime i think about home, everyone speaks differently i am so lost in their lingo, and i miss him, and mom and dad and sis and sara. so much.


when i arrived, i thought i would have a tough time clearing customs... but it turned out pretty easy and fast. nothing got confiscated haha. but what i didn't expect was the difficulties i would have once i touched down. like, how my plugs don't fit into the socket because they're a different kind. take note people who intend to go to aus or nz, the plugs are different from the ones you find in m'sia (which uses the uk kind). and how many things i didn't have which makes a house home. and i guess the whole getting used to it part. i really hope i'll make many friends here, don't want it to be a repeat of kl where i was lonely a lot of the time.


but thank God for ann ann who's helping me with well, hp lines and stuff. and my boyfie for giving me the support i need. things must be pretty tough for him as well. hugs love you babe for still wanting to be with me through distance and all. i did buy a few things already, adaptors and all... so yeah, hopefully things will get better from here. one day at a time denise.


also, to my lovely friends who've rained wishes and love on me, i love you guys too. keep me in your prayers as you are in mine. and people... i want news from home ok?

au revoir!

how the days just soar by. i'll be leaving in a coupla hours, there is no time to use fancy metaphors so, goodbye cute lil penang. i'll miss hokkien and food and rojak english. and to everyone who've somehow been there throughout my "leaving" period, whether through parties, wishes, get togethers, packing... i'm gonna miss you guys. goodbye til november.

with all my love,
denise


ps: next chapter- christchurch meets denise

i have a ton of things to talk to you about but you're not here.
i have got lots of things to say to you but the time is always not right.
in some aspects, you could compare me to a kid
because i'm crying out for you to pay attention to me.
because i really want to talk to you.
i want your time, i want your attention
to listen to my things and nothings

please?

wanna play?

when the weather's bad, when you've had just enough of everything, when you're just so emotionally exhausted... what do you do?

well, i usually play silly computer games to get my mind off things.

click me to find out what crap denise is playing now.

(try to beat my score :P )

or me to play whatever waste of time game she plays too!

hallo

i shall not complain of being home all day
i shall not grumble about being bored
i shall not whine about everyone being too busy to accompany me around

because working is infinately worse.


i should really do something productive. oh oh... i know! i'll bake tomorrow. and i guess i should really get to finalizing my packing *sigh*. part of why i loathe packing (other than being the usual slothy me) is that it brings the reality of leaving so much more ... real. it's like the luggage bag's smirking at me "you're leaving! HAHAH! *sucker punch*". but i suppose i must stop procrastinating soon. real soon. otherwise i might end up packing on the flight to nz.


i'll let you in on a secret: i'm having cold feet. as departure begins to draw near, i'm having all these thoughts of "what ifs", and well, sadly a lot of them are less than positive. scared la. lol. funny. since not going was never an option, not that i was forced to go, no nothing like that. but because i just knew that one day i'd be going overseas. i am thankful, but you know, like the groom who sits in the toilet in cold sweat right before the wedding... i know like him, i'll be glad i had the courage to take this huge step. lol, anyway, it's just going overseas right? no biggie.


and i have this outrageously oversized card from the wonderful people of ignite to send me off. so sweet of them really. because i never in my life expected that! and it was really a wonderful surprise.


it's lovely to be loved and to love. i'm a big big fan of love.

Faith the Dog

a little something to brighten up a darker day.

i think i need extra luggage weight. 20kilos is just not gonna suffice. boo.

and might i add, woolly jumpers are just so unflattering.

as i.m brushing away the glitter of december off my back, oh hello sobering january! the weight of real life comes again to weigh on my shoulders. things that i've tried to push to the back of my mind, i have to deal with now. yeah... like getting things in order, and saying goodbye. nothing too depressing and yet, important.

anyhoo... let me take a minute to grieve with the families of those boys (and teacher) who drowned in the dragonboat fiasco. how fast a bright flame is extinguished. these boys had bright futures, great ambitions to carve their niche in the world. and yet. life, oh life... how fleeting thou art. when we think we've got everything down pat, everything changes.

get off your butt denise! get out of your comfort zone!

i'm sensing a sudden depressing turn to this so change of subject. sooooo... here are some pictures of where i will be very soon. just so you have an idea of the place. and don't worry, it's very beautiful i assure you. honestly, part of new zealand's appeal is how people keep mentioning how beautiful it is.

concerned individual: so where will you be going to?

me: new zealand

c.i: oh really? beautiful place, so quiet.

me: mm... yea

i tell you, if i had 50sen to everytime this conversation happened, i'd be well... not rich, but at least i could but a mcvalue meal with it. but it is. beautiful i mean. ah can't be helped i guess... so go on, say it... i'll be able to bear it. i think?

anyway, feast your eyes.

looking at it, ok i admit, it is a rather measely feast. but still... more when i get there.

so eat up!

trip a lil trip

23 more days to cold christchurch.

i feel so unsettled just coming back from a holiday and starting to pack for another long-haul trip again. ok, well, not a trip exactly...

it's like, i can't see myself past "leaving for nz". everything in my vision of the near future stops and ends at "when i leave". i mean, i know life goes on and it's what i've always wanted, but as i cross of the days on my planner, i'm loathing to leave penang more and more. it's hard saying goodbye to your comfort zone and hear about your friends doing things you used to do. boo.

but wouldn't life be just boring without new experiences? besides, it's a real blessing that i was given the chance to go.

anyway...

bangkok was wicked!

if i could sum it all up in one word, i guess it'd be shopping. cos that's what we and a whole lot of tourists did the whole 4 days we were there. shopped til the very last minute we absolutely had to leave for the airport. i'm not really a shopping person, so after a day or two i started to get a bit sick of acquiring stuff. but we stayed in the middle of the shopping district so haha, what else is there to do?

but let's start at the beginning shall we? i have to admit, bangkok totally surpassed all of my expectations. i imagined a grime-filled, crime ladden congested city, but my first impressions were of how modern and organised the city actually is. they have this absolutely cool escalators at the airport which i wish i could ride again. hehe. and a lot of their malls are interlinked by walkways just under the LRT (whatever it's called there), so you don't have to risk getting knocked down by scary motorists while crossing the road.

and the malls... the Malls. think kl's pavillion and klcc, only flashier and much bigger. since we did much shopping there, i shall mention some of the places that we visited.

view from our hotel

Paragon was obviously the most high end of the lot. i mean, audi, lamborghini(i hope this is how you spell it?), lotus, porsche, bmw, and masseratti all have showrooms there. so you can imagine. but i liked it even if all we could do was salivate at the shop displays. very classy and posh, y'know? oh, and thumbs up for their gourmet market. lotsa fine imported food on display and sampling.



we frequented Central like a Lot. cos it was directly opposite our hotel so... haha yeah you get the picture. it's this really really ginormous shopping place with the biggest forever 21 i've ever seen. yes, that alone is worth a visit. this mall really reminded me of pavillion, similarities of shops inside i guess.



and on the other side of the scale, there's Platinum. i won't even call it a mall, it's more of rows and rows and more rows of shops selling clothes, bags , shoes, accessories mostly at wholesale prices. the only downside (or upside?) is that you have to purchase at least 3 pieces to be eligible for wholesale price. and most of the stuff looked like things you'd see on blogshops for a fraction of what it originally cost. my sis went absolutely crazy here needless to say.



and the funnest place was the chatuchak weekend market! the sheer size of it is scary. i don't think you'd be able to finish looking at everything there in a day. but definately worth a visit because they sell everything and anything from clothes to craft items to puppies there. i adore the craft section but too bad most of the things go in bulk, so couldn't buy much. it makes you want to start your own business just so you can buy them all back. yes it really does!

look how adorable they are! little fuzzballs...

things things things everywhere...

but, i was right on a few accounts; that bangkok is really a congested place. both with people and cars. still makes me exhausted to think of it. and the sky is grey on default. depressing really, all this pollution.

last day in bangkok. goodbye pollution!

tee-hee! some of the stuff we bought.