updates from where i left off

it's been so long. ages since i've had the initiative to come here and put in my 2 sen worth. ah... well, i blame my assignments (which are thankfully over and done with) and studying for the test (which is tomorrow, so wish me all the best!).

so, quite a lot has happened since i abandoned my kesian blog. haha.

~like almost losing it with my groupmates before our big human comm presentation. oh, i'm so glad it's over. i guess i must've been quite a pain in the arse to them by refusing to meet up early and being the first to leave always. heheh.

~erm... and completing my first ever mini animation. even though it's just in powerpoint (think jerky movements and not so sophisticated finish).. i still think it's quite an accomplishment. for me anyway... because i did it myself without help from anyone, but with lots of useful advice from many people. but, i wouldn't wanna do it again.. too much work and attention to detail for me.

~receiving my disappointingly bad spm results. there's nothing much i want to say about it so... i'll just take it as another of life's harsh lessons to learn. because like i always say, 'what that doesn't kill you will make you stronger', no? but it is hard, pretty tough medicine to swallow when i hear of my almost straight A scoring peers complaining about their slightly marred results. i guess people are never satisfied.

the tears have stopped falling. accepting my flaws i move on, cutting off the last remaining shreads of ties to my childhood. moving on to embrace maturity and stretch my wings to new and bigger things.

~i'm finally 18! with wheels (that don't belong to me yet), more allowance, excess to wherever i wanna go and movies i want to watch (as if i don't already watch >18 movies. hehe). well, i did have a great birthday. my college mates splurged and celebrated for me during our animation presentation in the morning. which was really touching considering i haven't been spending much time with them, plus i don't really socialise with them all that much.

one of the cakes... handmade by cousin.

and after gettng my results (yea, killing 3 birds with one stone on that day).. i realy didn't feel like going out to celebrate anymore. but i'm glad i did... otherwise i would be crying buckets of tears and moping at home. organized by my beloved "grandson". heheh (like he says..." the disadvantages of being my grandson"). we had korean bbq (first time for me) and later did the usual.. u know.. movie, lepak and all that. altogether managed to get me off my despondency with much love and thanks to them. ok, i'm babling.

another cake.

~oh yea, and also went guitar hunting for qian with lionel (surprise surprise!), sleepy-ivans, qian (of course) and my sis (even bigger surprise). bought a standard yamaha guit and managed to get the price reduced (a lil bit) thanks to lionel. also, celebrated an early b'day with them at breeks with cakes courtesy of qian. right now, i'm loaded with cakes. oh man, how am i gonna finish all of em?

so, altogether a very eventful start of the month. may the adventures of denise ong continue. ok stop. finish.

mulling over age

I had my first profession of love at the tender age of 6. boy, we sure do start young. at the age when the worst possible disaster that i thought could ever befall me was not being selected to join the pom-pom dance. this guy, a five year old kid, asked me to be his gf... aww...

anyway, that's beside the point. what i really meant to say is... somehow, by some fluke of nature, i do seem to be attracting some unwanted attention from younger guys (pardon) some younger guys. maybe i look so exceedingly young heheh... again, i'm not trying to boast or brag about it. just merely stating some facts.

i guess those who know me know some of my history concerning that. there were a few but i'm not going to elaborate and embarrass them here.

what i'm really trying to say is that, i used to become really disgusted when i come across these demi moore- ashton kutcher kinda stories. but then, i realised... what's so wrong about it besides the unconventional age difference? i mean, if their love supercedes the age boundary, heck! it should be pretty strong stuff right? age is just a small matter (haha... to hear that from me is like, really mind blowing for some people i bet. but i'm trying to change my mindset here aight!). so why do we kick up a big fuss about it? why do i make a big deal regarding it?

i recently spent a day with a guy a few years my junior just hanging out. it couldn't be called a date actually because
1. we are not a couple
2. we are not in the process of becoming one
3. we are just good friends.

but since i didn't have anyone, he offered to hang around with me to keep me company. we watched a movie, walked by the beach (yeala... gurney drive is BY the beach) and he waited with me almost until i went back. the almost-perfect gentleman. so, what i'm stressing here is that it felt perfectly normal, just like being with someone my age. or maybe it's because we're friends .... hmm... i'm confusing myself now.

if a younger guy were to ask me to be his gf tomorrow, i might even consider the possibility of it ever happening. haha.... maybe....

first traffic offense

it started out as an ordinary enough day. hung out with my friends after jogging in botanical in some kopitiam in pulau tikus. so, after having our fill of curry mee, headed back to our cars... that's when i saw....

this piece of paper on my windshield. oh crap! my first saman.

and some more for not paying my 60 sen parking fees, you know, those metal parking attendants..and in my forgetfulness, i forgot to feed it. so as you can see... the mppp officer took the time to lovingly pen out my summons and slap me with a 15 ringgit fine.

oh well... it hapens to everyone right? well, at least i wasn't sppeding or anything which is infinately worse when i bring it back for my dad to settle.

but, i did offer to pay for this one, as did shaun, but heheh... dad being dad obviously declined.

random

finally, i'm getting started on my assignment. after much procrastination, i'm actually getting my wheels going from stop to 1st gear. ahh... makes me feel more relieved to know that i'm on my way to passing it up. which kinda made me realise that i AM a very last minute person. i've counted the days in my organiser (surprise, surprise! i actually own one of those) and help me! i've less than a fortnight to complete it. but right now, i'm just operating on the 'sikit-sikit lama lama jadi bukit' principal.

like my computer table which is getting more and more cluttered as the days pass due to my unhealthy amount of time wasting in front of the pc. btw, pic is just a representation of my desk's messiness. not actual desk.

so.. results are coming out soon i hear. i'd rather not think about it at the moment.

anyway, i stumbled on some article which said that your braincells actually die slowly if you don't use your brain to think actively. omygosh! and what have i been doing lately, oh, you mean besides pigging out on unhealthy junk (seriously, i'm like the only one in my family who actually enjoys eating cake. so guess who has to polish up the goldmine of new yr cakes that people have been sending us?), couch potato-ing, going online til late at night....? erm... basically, nothing. that would mean i have a lot to worry about regarding the deterioration of my brain cells. oii come back! i've still got to get my diploma and then my degree and maybe my masters first. so, you heard it first from me. now go use your head! really, use it.

25 questions

just to pass the time. and it's been so long since i've actually done one of these quizzes.

1. Die young and have a truly amazing> life or die old and have a kind of> boring life?
die young. and then people will remember my amazingness... heheh.

2. Be stuck in an elevator for three> hours with your crush or your parents?
what kinda question is that? isn't it obvious?

3. Be a dog or a cat?
neither. ok fine... is i really had to choose... i'd rather be a cat. cats are pampered.

4. Watch TV or read a book?
can't decide. next

5. Take a shower or a bath?
shower. baths are really scary..don't you think so?

6. Be single until you're 40 and then> find your true love or date people> your whole life but never find your> true love?
again... i i'm not answering this

7. Visit England or Africa?
well... england i guess. anfield's there ya know (liverpool's homeground).

8. Use a pen or a pencil?
my trusty ol' pilot shaker. erm... that would make it a pencil.

9. Have depression or really bad> anxiety?
anxiety.

10. Be beautiful on the inside or the> outside?
ahh.. the age old question. well, the inside ler. i mean, no point being a beauty with no substance right?

11. Go to Xanga or Blogdrive or> Blogspot?
go figure! i've a blog here eh...

12. Move away from all of your friends> or have all of your friends move away> from you?
well... that depends really. i don't really mind whichever. guess i'd rather move away.

13. Have a stomach virus or a really> bad sore throat?
sore throat.

14. Be really smart or really> confident?
confident. coz i'm really lacking in that area. or maybe you'd like to beg to differ? hmm...

15. Mow the lawn or shovel the> driveway?
since i've no lawn and it doesn't snow here... next question!

16. Study five hours for a test and> get an A+ or not study at all and get> a D?
seriously, what kinda question is that? i would so rather study. hello! kiasuism!!!

17. Be able to fly or be invisible?
invisible. i'm kinda terrified of falling down and flying is kinda like falling at first. am i right?

18. Be deaf or blind?
blind i guess. at least i can still listen... but no, i'm so thankful i've got all my senses.

19. Go a week without electricity or> go a week without a bath?
electricity. i canNOT not take a bath at least once a day.

20. Play sports or go shopping?
well, at the moment, i'm really into playing sports... so, i'll go with the former.

21. Play tag or hide and seek?
oh man! all those old memories of playing them when i was a lil' kid. hide and seek. i was a really lousy hider but a lousier catcher.

22. Go to a concert or a party?
concert. i'm really not much of a party person. very unhappening i know.

23. Give up chocolate or meat?
can't. i love both equally as much! don't make me choose....

24. Have one best friend or a lot of> acquaintances?
one best friend.

25. Talk to somebody online or on the> phone?
online. i'm quite a bad phone talker, my bad. i'd much rather talk face to face.

love is an illusion (for now)

so everyone's been asking me what i've been doing on valentines day. and i'm like, "what valentines day???" ok, so that wasn't what i said. i mean, you've got to be completely oblivious to the world or otherwise in a coma to not notice it when all the heartsy lovey-dovey decorations start to come out and flowers and candy suddenly becomes overpriced. hotels and restaurants begin to advertise their special "one day only v'day promo" with cheesy names for their dishes like "love at first sight" in hopes that blokes get swept in the feverish rush of consumerism in hopes of impressing his date (how nice!).

anyway, i kinda agree with kennysia that v'day should really be called girlsday. not, of course, that i'm complaining. which female wouldn't want to be showered with gifts and affection and leave all the headache inducing planning for this so called 'special day' to their significant other, or at least, the guy who is desperately pining for you.

as for me, i had a wonderful night in the most unromantic glow of fluorescent light, a homecooked meal of spaghetti lovingly prepared by my ex-classmates (well, some of them anyway), washing it down with sparkling juice, reading magazines and watching tv, yelling our lungs out to 'i'm not a kid' (old school, haha) and finally proceeded to having "meaningful" conversations all night long. *sigh* and you say your RM200 meal plus trimmings dinner date was better.

so, why am i still alone but not lonely?

i've compiled a few might-be-reasons as to why i'm still single. what do you think?

1. the good guys are taken.

it's so sad! the guys that turn my head or at least have wonderful personalities which makes me think twice about them are usually hooked.

2. the guys i like are out of my league.

why oh why... do i have to like guys who are just, not right for me??? i guess, at this point, some of my friends would either be rolling their eyes or laughing out loud at some of the dudes that i like, or have liked. fine, be that way.

3. the guys i like have their eyes (and hearts) elsewhere.

*bursting into tears* ok, haha. moment over. it's really true. of all my 7 or 8 crushes/infatuations/likes, not one, not ONE of them have ever liked me. or at least, none that i knew of. how sad is that? i guess, maybe they didn't know or they just didn't care.

4. the ones who did, i ignored and/or treated kinda badly.

yes yes... i know... i'm mean. but, as i am well aware of, this is a harsh harsh world and feelings can't be forced. to the people i've hurt intentionally or not, my apologies.

5. lack of initiative.

what am i doing now?? instead of sitting here bemoaning my dateless bf-less existence, i should be planning strategems to snare that hot hunk asap. lol... even if i could bring myself to do such.. such... debauchary, i would never have the guts to actually put it to use. so... creative fishing is entirely wasted on me because it's so NMS (not my style) . i mean, HELLO!? isn't it supposed to be in men's nature to be pursue? so, guys, you do it la. ok, now tell me i've read too many girly mags. only too true.

so now, i'm trying... very hard... to stop thinking of type 2 (refer to no.2) .

and people still ask me why i'm single.

getting sporty

i'm proud to say that i'm a more healthy person this year. thx to my family who studiously go swimming every week, thus dragging me along despite my frequent moans and grumblings about it. i mean, i do like to swim and do sports... but when it comes to starting it, i have no initiative whatsoever. i guess i need a big shove for me to start. but once i get going, it takes a lot of persuading (and for me to get falling on the ground exausted) to get me to stop. anyway, why am i getting into this?

easy does it now. i will touch my toes. i will touch my toes.

oh yea. spent saturday morning playing badminton with the girls and most of the supper gang. lazy to name names... you know who you are. it's sorta like, qian's b'day party... with a difference. which i think is pretty cool coz i'm infinitely sick of hanging out in malls, doing the same old... you know... movie, eat, hang around feeling bored. so, haha, for all you know... i might be the next sports addict. okla, it's quite unlikely... so you can stop laughing now.

other than the masquerade on sat night which everyone brought their masks but about 5% actually wore them... life's just .. you know... life. listening to some people's fears about spending v'day alone... dreading cny (don't ask)... no rain (very hot). yep.. that's about it.

a very boring post i know

studying again

it's just been 2 months since "it" and one more month before "it's" results come out and here i am... studying, yea actually studying for another of world's mindless tests created just to torture and terrify poor innocent students like yours truly. all in the name of edoooocation. ah yea... exams... and this is not even a major end of sem exam (which contributes to a major part of my credit points).

so... ask me again why i'm freakin out here?

and yeah, if you're one of those who have the "mass comm... must study one ah?" mindset , the answer is YES! must study. you won't believe what WE mass comm students have to cram and memorise and do reaserch (yes, even that) to pass our papers. we suffer just as business or law students do. ok, maybe we do less book work as them, but still... we do study. so who says us media students are less intellectual than our medicine counterparts (for instance).

ok, so that was me. at least i thought you didn't have to study for mass comm (you know, the memorising and all that crappy stuff), coz well, i'm kinda bad at memory work. and (fine, i'll admit it) i'm also pretty lazy. which is kinda why i went into this field in the first place. and of coz also because of the fact that i AM actually interested in it. i'm just saying this in all honesty... hey, i happen to be human ya know... a very human human.

a human that is currently debating whether or not to go for qian's b'day getogether tonight or not. see, i have this human comm paper tomorrow a.k.a lotsa last minute stuffing, jamming and cramming to do. so... i really don't know what to do . any suggestions?

~i am a kiasu person and i'm not ashamed of it~


i'm a penang driver afterall....

pre-v'day post

i've been trying, and still trying to write a v'day post. but wadaheck! everything i was gonna say or was planning to anyway, sounds utterly cheesy and cliche... so... i'm left without anything blog-worthy now. any ideas?


and yes... to all those questions... i'm spending (yet) another universally acknowledged, much looked out for or loathed day of lurveee as a single. yeayea... in other words... boyfriend-less. at the moment that is. but of course... if you should so happen to want to pamper me on that day... heck! flowers, chocolates, jewellery would be more than welcome.



*grins*



i'm a girl after all! what would you have me do?



but if you must know, all i want for 14/2/07 is... *sigh*

27 year old drumsticks.....

haha.

enough said.

yesterday

the good news... my foot's really very fine now. except for lookin like i sunburnt my foot, it looks as good as new. *big toothy grin*

the bad... the kwan's (as steph calls them) have left the island for greener pastures. aikz. it's really weird without you guys... 'the girls' are not complete.

spending today recuperating from yesterday's activities. really crazy. spent quite a lotta time in church polishing up our drama for ignite (which was yesterday) and well, what can i say? it was really tiring but i don't regret it one bit.

so, the drama... yea i like acting, but i prefer bossing people around even more. haha. but, that's beside the point. well, in a nutshell, the story's about this girl, lulu, in a dysfunctional family who gets conned by this "suave" young (and i mean, really young) guy who well... you know... rapes her and all that la. to make matters worst, her grandma dies too (after her randezvous). and also about this 2 guys who got into an accident while out clubbing/pill-popping etc. can you believe they actually made a car out of styrofoam for them to trash?? this was like (in my opinion) the coolest scene in the whole drama cos they were like head banging and doing stupid stuff to the tokyo drift song. it really was TFTF (the fast and the furious), ya know? and to cut the long (yea it was kinda long) story short, girl and family gets saved, guy gets saved. finito.

i was lulu. can you imagine that? and funnier still... matt had to be the 'bad guy'. lol... i mean, he's like what, 3 yrs younger than i am. but still... it didn't look too awkward (well, i hope it didn't). to quote steph, this whole drama's sick in a twisted way. my mama's younger than me, and so is my daddee (lolx... steph and mark who make great parents btw), and horror upon horror!!! i'm also older than my grandma (well, same age as pris, but if you count the months...) ! shocking right! well, this is for antzy's benefit (if she reads this), the other characters were kon way and melvin, the 2 pillheads (i guess you can consider tic-tac as ecstasy now) and wei kwong as doctor. yep... that's about it. but of cos, michelle and nick were the real people behind it, helping us all the way.

well, what else? ignite was ignite. but with a lack of songs though... probably due to the lack of time. the day before, sally asked me to pray that night without giving me a topic yet. and funny thing was, when i was idling on the couch after lunch (with pris, qian and steph... at mcD, i drove btw...finally) and well, i was kinda worrying ( a bit) about what i was gonna pray about. so, i was thinking about the words when i was kinda prompted to pray for the youths in pg. so when sally finally told me what i was supposed to pray for, guess what? the youths of penang. no joke! i was like, whoa! ok...